Ep 48: The 4 Attachment Styles & Avoidant Personality

Doc Bok, Doc Fish
Feb 24, 2026 23 min Personality Couch Podcast
Blog: Are Avoidant Personalities Avoidantly Attached?


In this episode of the Personality Couch Podcast, we (licensed clinical psychologists Doc Bok and Doc Fish) unpack attachment and its relationship with avoidant personality disorder. We explore the four main attachment styles: secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized, discussing how these styles manifest in adult relationships. We highlight the nuances of avoidant personality disorder, suggesting that individuals may present as avoidantly attached but have underlying anxious tendencies. We end by discussing some interesting research on adult attachment and coregulation with a partner, suggesting that attachment is fluid and can change depending on the relationship homeostasis.

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Chapters

  • 00:00 Intro to Attachment & Attachment Styles
  • 05:15 Secure Attachment
  • 06:08 Anxious Attachment
  • 09:08 Avoidant Attachment
  • 13:09 Disorganized Attachment
  • 14:38 Attachment in Adulthood
  • 16:54 Avoidant Personality Disorder and Attachment Dynamics
  • 22:22 Summary & Conclusion

Additional Podcast References

  • Ainsworth, M. S. (1979). Infant-mother attachment. American Psychologist, 34(10), 932-937. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.34.10.932
  • Bartholomew, K., & Horowitz, L. (1991). Attachment styles among young adults: A test of a four-category model. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61(2), 226-244. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.61.2.226
  • Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and Loss: Vol. 1. Attachment. New York, NY: Basic Books.
  • Disney, K. L., Weinstein, Y., & Oltmanns, T. F. (2012). Personality disorder symptoms are differentially related to divorce frequency. Journal of Family Psychology, 26(6), 959-965. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0030446
  • Harlow, H. F. (1958). The nature of love. American Psychologist, 13(12), 673-685. https://doi.org/10.1037/h0047884
  • Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. R. (1987). Romantic love conceptualized as an attachment process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52(3), 511-524. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.52.3.511
  • Rosario, M., Espinosa, A., Gagnon, G., Talhouk, L., & Neff, B. (2021). Associations among parental and romantic attachment, personality disorder symptoms, and physical health. Journal of Health Psychology, 26(10), 1609–1624. https://doi.org/10.1177/1359105319890027
  • Wichstrøm, L., Wilberg, T., Hartveit Kvarstein, E., & Steinsbekk, S. (2025). Childhood predictors of avoidant personality disorder traits in adolescence: A seven‐wave birth cohort study. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 66(3), 366–377. https://doi.org/10.1111/jcpp.14064
Avoidant